The Seinfeld 9/11 Spec Script – “The Twin Towers”
Have a long road trip ahead of you and need a fun way to kill some time? First solution 1) Listen to all the Buddy Book Club Episodes and read all of our blogs for the second or third time depending on how loyal of a fan you are 2) Read through and act out the Seinfeld 9/11 Spec script, as D-man recently suggest on our Mistborn Episode.
If you like Seinfeld, (a small sitcom in the 90’s, likely your first time hearing about it), and you also like dark comedy this is the perfect mix. We might be a little late to the game on this one, as this was written in 2016, but writer Billy Domineau some how captures the tone of Seinfeld but with darkness turned to 11.
Domineau now a writer for SNL, would also fit right in as a writer for It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, which is a modern darker Seinfeld (IMHO).
Here is the full 44 page spec script, it’s worth the read if you have time. While it is quite dark, it is funny to imagine the characters in the aftermath of 9/11 and somehow adding some levity to a tragic event. Below is a SparkNotes (we are a book podcast after all) of the script so you know what you’re getting yourself into:
Plot
Jerry – Disgusted by all the dust in the city, is unable to live in the post 9/11 world
Elaine – Unable to break up with her boyfriend who was in the towers and survived the attack
George – Pretends to be a be a hero that saved countless lives during the attack
Kramer – On a mission to get reimbursed for the box-cutter he lost in the attacks – because he lent it to terrorist Mohamed Atta
Funniest Lines
JERRY
Sorry about the guy you were seeing.
ELAINE
Brian? Meh.
JERRY
Meh? What do you mean, meh? He was murdered by terrorists.
ELAINE
I was gonna break up with him anyway.
ELAINE
You wouldn’t kiss her because of DUST?
JERRY
It was all I could see! It was coming at me like a 747!
KRAMER
You know he was always talking about how evil America was? Eventually I told him, “Why don’t you do something about it?” I thought he’d write to his Congressman!
JERRY
Kramer, he just crashed a plane into the World Trade Center! He slit the pilots’ throats with a box-cutter!
KRAMER
Not “a” box-cutter – MY box-cutter. He borrowed it last week!
