All Quiet on the Western Front – Erich Maria Remarque – Episode 38

The Buddies entrench themselves into the World War 1 literary classic All Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria Remarque. The book was pretty depressing and not all that easy to joke about, so the buddies stuck to more serious topics like going to the bathroom in public, post work clothes, rats, and awful teachers. The movie just hit Netflix as well, so the Buddies help cast the movie (if it were in English). Stock up on your  cigarettes and cigars, grab yourself a spade, and dig into this most recent episode of the Buddy Book Club (and while you’re at it enlist by hitting that follow button). 

Intro: (0:00-2:35)
 Stock Up/Down (2:36-33:52)
 Favorite Scene (33:53-36:58)
 Favorite Character (36:59-38:26)
 Love/Hate (38:27-47:07)
Listener Email (47:08-48:09)
Casting the Movie (48:10-49:50)
Conclusion (49:51-50:11)

Next Book: SIX OF CROWS by LEIGH BARDUGO

Transcript for SEO purposes 🙂

Alright. Welcome to a book club. I’m Dylan, here with my comrade Keith. What’s up, buddy? Hello. We’re breaking down some bestsellers this week. We’ll be discussing All Quiet on the Western Front by Eric Maria Ramarkay. Yeah, that’s where we’re going. If you like, where I recommend a book for us to read or reach out to us about our test episodes, you can visit our website. But we booked.com or signed audience on Twitter or Instagram. But a book called Podcast. You can list us on itunes and spotify. So please download and subscribe. Okay, Keith. So this is part of our kind of like back to school session. This is probably going to be the last one we do before we dive back into the fantasy realm. But this is supposed to be the highest grade level that we’ve read, and it definitely is. But this and the Alchemist back to back, I feel like it’s kind of tough because they’re both so damn serious. The Alchemist was metaphorical, perhaps, or was all a drug induced frenzy. We go into that, which is kind of life lessony to this, which is a pretty detailed first person description of what it’s like to be a German soldier during World War I, or really any soldier. This is a German book, and we know the Germans aren’t necessarily known for their levity. They’re usually pretty serious. And then the last book was a Brazilian book, and we know there’s a certain amount of Germans for some reason in Brazil also. So we just know these are two serious books. That’s what it comes down to. There used to be one of those shows on Discovery Channel, which was great. It was about these Israeli commandos that would go into South America to hunt down Nazi war criminals. That was on the Disney Channel. Discovery. Discovery. I didn’t think Disney I was like, what the yeah, so it was pretty wild. There was like reenactments of these things that happened in the but it was pretty cool. They had to confirm this is a Nazi. And then because they didn’t have jurisdiction, they’d go in, murder them, and then get out. Was it fictional or this is true story? Oh, shit. Oh, wow. Okay. That’s kind of cool. But you can’t like, oh, bring them back to Israel to stand trials. Like, no, you go in there, you murder them, and you get out. It’s. Well, that’s completely different than all quiet on the Western Front. All quiet on the Western Front has nothing to do with Nazis. This is World War I. This is pretty Nazi. And it’s just our main character, Paul, and his story about him and his come on odds as they’re kind of going through the war. But it’s just the story. It’s pretty much war as hell. And fuck the man. What do you have for stock up? Post work clothes? Stock up so you know when you get back? I mean, obviously we’re working from home now, so it’s a little different. But you get back and back in the day, I get my Khakis off or the messy shorts on. You’d take off your tie or whatever you’re wearing back there, your hipster gear. But, yeah, there’s just nothing like getting into those sweats. But how about Paul coming back home and he’s wearing his full military attire, and some officer starts dressing them down, being like, how dare you not salute me? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Like, a guy that’s never seen the front, hasn’t seen a minute of war time shitting on him. I would not be able to take that. I just wouldn’t be able to do it. I’d slug that guy right in the face. And that the best case scenario, is you get arrested, right, and you don’t go back to the front. Well, they did discuss a little bit how they would send you to I can’t remember what they called it, like the island or the fortress. The fortress. That’s what it’s called. Which is basically a World War I prison, which yes, it’s not the front, but it’s equally terrible. I mean, people will die of diseases and whatnot. Additionally, the point that he makes for the fortress thing is that you then lose your purpose. Yeah. You’re not in the war, but then what are you doing? You’re like, doing nothing. Surviving. Yeah. Alive. There’s so much camaraderie and brotherhood that he doesn’t want to leave those guys anyways. But I agree with you. That whole part was so infuriating. Fuck this guy. And, you know, that’s definitely a thing. Oh, yeah, for sure. It still happens today, I’m sure. The whole point is no one was asking him more questions after he got back either, once he took all the gear off. So it was just like, all right, I can just chill and not be hounded by these fucking people that have never seen or I’ve seen. It also must be wild when you’re daily carrying around. It’s what people do. Now, for fun, I put on this weighted vest, and I wear it all day so I can stay strong. When I take it off, I feel £30 lighter. It’s like, yeah, well, that’s what these soldiers are doing every day. Like, he’s got extra ammo, food, like med kit, his weapon, all of this stuff. Those helmets must weigh £10. And to just all of a sudden, one day you go, only take it all off and be wild. Probably you can fly. Yeah. You know, these dudes are completely under fed. They’re probably at, like five, seven, like a buck 20 maybe, you know, like, they’re carrying around they’re not eggs and chicken type guys that they are today. They’re not the Ubermens. Yeah. I just remember Jim Tomy during the steroid era where everyone was taking steroids baseball. Yeah. And they’re like, Jim, tell me he’s never been accused of anything. And they asked him. So what’s the deal? You’re hitting all these hormones. Yeah, I just work on a farm and I eat, like, eggs a lot and chicken, and they’re like, all right, case closed. He says how he’s had that face and that body are like, yeah, that makes sense. His neck didn’t grow six inches in the course of, like, two years. Yeah, he just looked like this big oak, like, the whole time. No offense, Jim. Tell me. I know he’s a big fan of the program. It’s not an install, it’s a compliment. My first stock up is card games for three people. So there’s really not many card games out there. I mean, let me know you or listeners out there. Let me know if I’m mistaken here. But, you know, you can play like Rummy, you can play Cribbage. It’s kind of difficult, but from my understanding, there’s not a lot of card games for three people. But the game Scat, which is referred to several times throughout this book, is actually the national card game of Germany and is built for three people. It’s also a trick based game. I’m not sure if you’re familiar with trick based games. Are you? Okay, so they play like, Euchre out here in the Midwest. Really? It’s kind of like a turn based game. There’s usually some sort of trump suit. There’s an auction system. Usually the cards have different hierarchies. It’s super fun, and I read up on this game a little bit. I was like, shit, I should actually learn this. I love a good card game. By trick base, you mean they’re not like performing tricks, right? You just mean they’re like is it a system to it like an auction to it or something? Yes. They’re not performing tricks and they’re not turning tricks. Like, magic cards are disappearing in their hands. Like, hey, part of the game. Bo. Sorry. David Blaine’s out there in the psalm, the battle of the psalm, just making cards disappear. No, it’s not like that. Trick is I can’t really explain it. It’s going to take too long because I’m also just not well versed in how to explain these things. I’m maybe the worst person that explains games. People always get really angry at me, so I’m not going to do it here. Yeah, not like turn based. I’m not going to try. You know what? I’m, like, starting to be going to I get it. No, I got it. Yeah, it just means complicated. Go on. Yeah, it means complicated. They actually are typically complicated. 45 is a good trick based game. On the other hand, people always say, I explain rules that only help myself, so we’d be a good combination. Yeah. So I’m all in on scat. I want to get involved. Yeah, it’s a good name for a game, too. I like it. Yeah. There’s also a different, like, an American Scat game categories. Yeah, no, it’s a card game. It’s a little more simplistic it’s pretty much you just, like, try to get three cards to equal 31 or some 21 or something like that. Not blackjack. Don’t play that game with me. What’s the game where you throw down cards? It’s like kind of like war, but it’s basically you go around a circle, you throw in a card. If you get the jack’s, the best card an ace, slap, four slap, jack. Great game. You just keep throwing that card until there’s a jack, and you slap and you get the whole pile. No, this is different. Oh, you’re talking about spit. Spit? No, that’s not spit. We’re going to go through everything. Yeah, I was going to say that. I was talking about card games. Egyptian rats grew. That’s what’s called you heard of that before? I just made that up. I prefer Persian. Persian ratscrew. I mean, they’re not that great at screwing or rats. All right, I’ll be your old all right, what do you got next? Let’s talk up war swag. And by swag, I mean confidence. Okay. This book is obviously about the horrificness and awfulness of war. But if there’s a silver lining, it’s just the fact that these dudes had the most swagger of all time after this, they’re picking up girls, not even speaking their language. They’re going back. They’re basically telling teachers to fuck off. They just have a whole different vibe after the war because they don’t give a shit about anything. They talk about how, like, materialism used to be important to them, and then there’s like, why do I even care about that? What does it matter anymore? It’s not good, roughly, but it’s not bad at looking at things in a much different light. A lot of this book actually reminded me of Fight Club. They’re explaining the whole how you grow up and you’re total these things and materialism and patriotism and all these things are kind of ingrained in you. And then you get to a situation that you realize, oh, no, that really matters. It was kind of like the convenience store guy getting a gun in his face, and he said this is the best day of his life. All foods and tastes better. Everything’s going to be better. And that’s kind of like the whole situation with them, the whole war, is they’re appreciating things that are shitty just because they just went through the worst thing they could possibly go through. I agree to some degree, I think there’s unfortunately, because of this war and the PTSD stuff, which it’s like the concussions in NFL the PTSD stuff. You mean when they get shell? Shocking. NFL, yeah, exactly. How is this not identified as a serious mental problem before, I don’t know, 20 years ago? Like, what the heck was going on in the world that people were just like, oh, look at this pansy. Well, everyone’s dealing with it. Although some of those moments might exist where you get to lay up and look at the sky and not feel like you’re going to get murdered and be like, oh, that’s a really great day. There’s also probably a level of cynicism and that comes through in the book of humanity and just life in itself and what’s it all for kind of thing. Then unfortunately, I feel like clouds over how good that burger is going to taste after your final point is like once you don’t care about anything, you’re able to I forget the quote in FICO, but there’s like a really quote about that. It’s like once you’re giving up on everything, you can then start living kind of thing. And they kind of had that vibe. Obviously, that was the small silver lining I got from it. But yeah, pretty much everything else was the worst possible case scenario. In terms of your initial point about the swag, it’s also when they get the new recruits in, the new recruits look at them like, holy smokes, these guys are total badasses. Which they are. But it reminded me actually a lot of Band of brothers. Are you familiar with that HBO miniseries? After watching this or reading this, I was like, I need to commit because I keep on watching it and I kind of get zoned out after the first episode. But you’ve said so many times that’s like the best docu or whatever series you’ve seen, so I just need to do it. Yeah, definitely is. I would also suggest, considering we’re a book podcast, that you should just read the book or listen to the book. It’s a short book. Steven A. Ambrose, who normally does like more epic books, wrote the book on it and it’s really, really good. The book is almost word for word, the show. They did such a good job of it. With that being said, there is an episode called The Replacements, which is about the replacements that come in after DDay. And they’re the same age, maybe a year younger or whatever, as the guys who just went through DDay. But they look at these guys like they’re movie stars. Holy shit. They got campaign badges on. They’ve got different medals and whatnot. They’ve obviously been a little hardened by war. And it’s like, oh my god, these are badasses. And even in all quantum notes in front, when they’re talking about it, they try to school up the young guys about the sounds the different mortars make and the bombs make and how to identify different caliber weapons and whatnot. And they’re just looking for guys. They’re superheroes. And so there’s definitely that level of swag, too. My next stock up is pooping in public. What’s the stock price? That right, stock price is pretty low. Although they do have those new public bathrooms that are like single. Have you ever seen those? You flick the light and it makes the windows opaque. Have you ever seen that? Oh, yeah, I have seen that. I would never trust that. I would rather have the lights on. There is that hilarious tik tok thing or something about some guy who goes into a restaurant that has one of these, like, a posh restaurant and just doesn’t realize the situation. Well, everyone can see it must be fake because it’s too perfect. Either way. Stock up. Have you ever pooped in public? What do you mean? Like gone into a Home Depot and pooped in a fake toilet? No, just out in the public. Not I’ll tell my buddy story and see if you have another sibling. So we’re at a party. This is in college, and it’s a big house party going on. Got flip cup going on. We got everything going on. Bathroom situation isn’t great. That’s back to the matter. And nobody’s never been like, I really need to take a shit. I’m, like, just came up. We’ll close the door. No one will fucking no, it’s fine. Just came up. He’s like, no. I’m like, come on. He comes back 10 minutes later, goes to the bathroom. I’m like, I get it done. He’s like, yeah, he went outside, took a shit in the grass, just took a shit out there. And we’re like, wait, what? She just literally went to the yard and took a shit in the yard. And it came in and wiped out of straight out of me, myself and Irene. But also, I have a huge rule, which is you never let the cheeks touch until the wiping has occurred. I think that’s a pretty straight standard rule, isn’t it? You never let the cheeks touch. Okay, yeah, I see what you’re saying. You must have a good, clean energy. I don’t know. You can’t trust that. I’m sure it was terrible, but the most savage thing is he literally was shitting out. If anyone walked out and just saw him, they’d be like, what the fuck is going on? No, I did have a friend who likes to poop in outside. Let’s say in teenage years, like, when you’re twelve to 14, if there’s any women listening, I apologize. Men, especially young men, are just disgusting creatures. The movie Bridesmaids, when the mom’s like, oh, I have a twelve and 14 year old, and I’m so happy to get away. Like, I cracked a towel in half the other day. That is the most accurate representation of having young boys. So basically, this friend like to poop outside. Long story short, he pooped in the woods and wiped his butt with poison sumac and was too scared to tell his mom because we were like twelve or 13. And so spent the next week pretty much just like, with his legs, sleeping with his legs in the air and like a fan at the end of the bed. Like a terrible situation. This same friend, when our bathroom was getting renovated, we had another bathroom, but I told him we didn’t and I made him poop under my porch. So yeah, boys do stupid things. You should be an asshole. But in this book, Pooping in Public, it actually happens fairly early on and they pretty much just all get crates, go out in the woods in this beautiful field, and they all just sit on these crates, have a laugh and poop together out in the field. And I thought, how amazing is that? Because I work in a corporate setting. And maybe not anymore after this podcast, but I work in a corporate setting. When I first started, I used to have a lot of fear of going in there and pooping while other people were in the bathroom. I’m the kind of person that I didn’t poop in school until I was in high school and I found a perfect bathroom that usually no one was in other than that I used to like in middle school and elementary school, I said I was sick. So the idea that these guys are so free and they even say in there like, what’s there to be shameful? Because I’m like, oh my God, I’d be so ashamed. And they’re like, what’s there to be shameful as? I’m thinking at the last time, it’s like, what’s going to be shameful about? It’s just as normal as eating or drinking or any of the other normal bodily function. You’re so right. I wish I could embrace that. What about you? Well, the difference is they just see their buddies intestines the other day. I think the same thing with doctors and things like that. They have less, way less shame of a lot of those things just because they’re like, yeah, it’s a human body. Who cares? Whereas I think if you’re in a corporate setting, as I wrote in the buddybook blog, it’s a Taco Tuesday and then you have to look your coworker in the eyes after coming to a stall. It’s just a tough it’s a tough thing to do. But I wish I had that same freedom that they have as well. But I wouldn’t be willing to go to war for it. No, there’s that. Well, maybe you just have to go to corporate war for it. Because I think I’ve told this story maybe even on here before about when the CFO came into the office and who we never see. And it’s just like the biggest swinging dick obviously is the CEO. He’s the CEO of the company, 5000 person company or something. Walks into the communal bathroom. Hey guys, how are you? He has a couple of other people washing their hands. I’m like, what’s going on? He immediately goes into it, doesn’t wait for people. I would normally wait for everyone to leave before kind of starting. He just walks into the bathroom and unleashes the most unheard of airplane diarrhea because he’s been flying back and forth places. This airplane diarrhea sprayed all over the world. Can only assume based on the sound that it made. And I was like, holy shit. That was insane. And he’s one of those that’s more of an alpha thing, I’m guessing. He’s like, I have to do this. He probably took some sort of substance in order to do that. But he was also like a lightning quick. Like, he went in there, did this shit, and by the time I finished washing my hands, he came back out. Like he looked us in the eye. Doesn’t wash his hands

 

and shakes your hand. You shake it. Yeah, it tells me shake it.

 

Yes, but either way, pooping in public. Stock up. Good for these guys. I’m going to start carrying a crate around and drop my draws. And found the center. Okay, let’s get into stock down. What do you have? This one, I think, is pretty obvious. Teachers. Stock down. Canterreck fuck that dude. Literally, I thought we were going to get into, like, pick your character. Like, don’t pick your character. But yeah, I can’t. Yeah. He is just the absolute fucking worst. Just a government mouthpiece convincing a bunch of young high school kids to join the army. Basically, it’s just disgusting. The teacher’s job, even in today, the only thing that they should be doing is basically teaching them new things and telling them to question everything. That’s it. That’s their only job. They should never be influencing them in any way. It should say, hey, you like addition and subtraction here’s. Multiplication. That’s the new thing I’m opening up to you. You can now understand that. Now start questioning how that works. You think Goosebumps are the best book series? Fuck you. Try harry Potter. Whoa. That’s influence. They’re saying now you can determine if you like it or not. I’m introducing you to different things along the way. They should never be telling you, here’s the right thing to do. And I think our teachers growing up did a great job of this same church, religion, governments, all these different things. And they said, here’s why people like it. Here’s why people don’t like it. That’s it. You guys can determine that this Tantrac dude just the fucking worst. Interesting, because well, I think in anything just on a human level, you’re going to have influence. That’s just the way it is. Even if you’re a teacher and you’re supposed to kind of let people pick their own destiny, their own story is to choose your own adventure novel. You’re leading them towards something. And I think that part’s hard, but I totally agree with you. This can’t correct things. But he’s a great character for this because he personifies this idea of, like, blind patriotism and also the idea of romanticizing war. He calls them Iron Youth. Yes, the Iron Youth. He was like, oh, you mean the guys. You’re the irony. If you’re going to bring glory back to the fatherland and all this stuff, when patriotism, I respect it. I don’t find myself to be super patriotic. Personally. I respect people that are. But to just be blindly patriotic and just say, oh, I’m going to war because the country is at war is tough for me. And I love war novels. I love war books. I’m obsessed with more podcasts. I mean, if you’re listening to US, turn us off. Go. Listen to Dan Carlin. He’s way better. But Dan Carlin does an amazing job, especially with World War I. It’s called Blueprint for Armageddon. Oh, my God, is that such an amazing series? Like, I did Goosebumps just thinking about it. And this book ties a lot into that, for sure. But the idea of just saying, oh, I’m going to do this for the country. Yeah, everything’s great until you actually get your boots on the ground and you realize you’re just a small cog in this giant machine and no one gives a fuck about you. And I’m cynical on this, obviously, so if people feel otherwise, I’m sorry, but there are just causes out there. World War Two, I feel like, was a just cause for sure. And America has been just kind of getting the tail end of both of these world wars. They had the best gig and all thing that came in, cleaned it up and took all the glory. Yes, USA was crushing it back in the day at wars, especially after World War I when the whole infrastructure of Europe was nil and the United States could just build all the manufacturing. They’re just this giant island, really, and they could just build all the manufacturing that’s become the greatest world power. And then World War II comes along, they sweep in for the last couple of years, clean everything up and take all the glory. Eh? Okay. You know, hey, I respect, I respect. Don’t hate the player, hate the game. I feel it. I think World War I swept in. I would say World War II. They were pretty bored. Well, I mean, in terms of body count, we’re still fucking under a Nazi rule. If it weren’t for the boys, us in Canada coming to France and UK, the UK was getting their shit kicked in. Truthfully, after Operation Barbosa, when Hitler decided to go and fight Stalin and the boys, that was his biggest mistake because it was all ticking clock. Like Hitler was going to go down at some point after that. US came in at the right time, in my opinion, but we definitely made it. So it didn’t last as long as that’s for sure. But let’s get back to the point here with the canteric stuff. This idea of blind patriotism, it continued on. I think things have kind of quieted down a bit now that everyone’s kind of into their own bullshit with social media and whatnot. Like there’s no real nations anymore. I feel like it’d be hard if there was actually a I think Russia and China still have that. Yeah, there’s definitely some blank North Korean patriotism, and it brings in the whole media aspect, but the media aspect is just a giant telescope almost, of what can IAK is right, because he’s there one person who they look forward for information, and he’s telling them what the right thing is, which is what people do all day long. At least we now have more voices that we can list. It’s not just one person. They didn’t have the other side of it. Unfortunately, often, more often, I have to seek out the other side, and a lot of people don’t want to do that. Okay, so my stock down is the Lexile reading level. So we used that to kind of figure out what kind of books we wanted to give her. Okay, yeah, that’s like I read it in, like, 6th grade, maybe it’s like, okay, LexL says it’s like a fourth grade book. I’d be like, okay, interesting. Like, this looks pretty heavy for a fourth grade, but whatever. I write in 6th grade, lex l’s calling me an idiot. This book, all acquired on the Western Front, is like what would you say it was? Like a 6th grade reading level? Yeah, it was fourth grade. Somehow I don’t know how that is possible. Oh, fuck these Lexile people. Because if I read this to a fourth grader, they would probably have nightmares and also learn a lot of interesting new words. Some of them swear words, other words, like gangrene and amputation, things that probably aren’t super right for someone that’s ten years old. I think there’s something that’s wrong with that process in terms of, okay, the words. You’re going to understand most of the words. Yeah, you’re going to understand most of the words, but are you going to understand the point? Because you and I are 35 years old and we don’t understand the point of half the books we read. So fuck Lexile. I can read the words, but will I understand the point? Do we understand what’s happening? Like, what the conversation really is? I like having these labels on the books, to be honest with you, because your boy was not a good reader. I’m barely a good reader now, but, I mean, back in the day, that hurt me a little bit. I guess that’s kind of like getting trophies now in sports participation trophies. Yeah. So I can’t really argue that because I don’t really care for those either. If someone made it competitive, I would have been much more into reading. Someone’s like, you won’t fucking read that book your classmates are reading. I’d be like, all right, that’s it. I still can’t read them. But something about it. Maybe I was like a cynic at a young age, because I remember I read a book on balto. You remember that dog that, like, saved some people or whatever? Lassie. He’s in the well, no, that’s a different one. But my dad was like, you did such a good job. You’re reading this book that’s. Supposed to be read for a third grader. And I was like, I don’t know. This book seemed pretty stupid. The third grader is just dumb or like this thing and it turns out, no, it was stupid. It’s probably just all marketing scheme like everything else. What else do you have for Stockdown? Kind of touched on this a little bit already, but Stockdown surviving war by the end of the book, it was pretty depressing. He was basically, like, the best thing that could possibly happen in the war. It sounds like it’s just an instant death. Everything else was the worst possible thing. You get either shot and you’re just left on the battlefield for days on end, suffering while you die. You get shot and then you get carried to a medic thing, and then you suffer in there for days until you die. Or you get trained off and you suffer until you die. Or they cut off your limbs and you’re just basically stuck with your own mind and the PTSD that you’re going to be caring for the rest of. I also love how they’re like, oh, the prosthetics are really good these days. And I’m thinking, what do you mean these days? It’s like 1915. Yeah. Wow, good fan. And then they just have the doctors that are, like, doing experiments on them and shit. I was like, oh my God. And then you come back and people are like, man, we’re about to win this war. You have, like, two legs cut off. You’re just sitting there. You’re just like, I’m going to fucking kill this person. Yeah. So I’d much rather just die quick and painless and have to go through this. Basically, I took away from this book for sure. Just kill me there. At the end of the book, Paul dies. And the way that it’s done, they say that he died with a smile on his face. Pretty much. I thought he had, like the Mona Lisa smile is what I imagined. Okay, yeah, I could see that. And it’s because everything’s lost to him. He doesn’t want to go back to this world, talk about the PTSD, so he doesn’t feel connected with that world anymore. I mean, I’m paraphrasing here, but they took a bunch of wanderlust interested in the world 18 year olds, introduced them to war, and made them not interested in anything else. Like, anything at all ever again. You’ll never be the same. So what’s the point living this, like, shitty life with all this trauma when you could just die in a fucking mustard gas hole and call it a day? So it’s terribly sad, but prophetic about war for sure, or at least war at the time. And other war books, I’m just going to continue with that. But because we’re talking about the surgeries and stuff at the time, this all seems so grisly, like, fuck. And even the doctor, when they do like, well, where’s my friend my friend’s dying is like, oh, what’s bed your friend in? And he’s like, I don’t know the guy. Oh, it’s bed 23. They have a leg. He’s like, I don’t know who that is. I’ve imputed five legs today. Holy shit. I’m thinking about the Civil War battlefields, which is obviously I know I was in medieval shows where they just go around the battlefield and just like, stick knifes and people make sure they’re dead. But they’re just sitting out there in the battlefield, like, dying for days on air. That wasn’t medieval. That was actually, like, fairly recent. They’ve been doing that. Yeah, I guess that’s true too. I mean, fuck, they’re probably doing a Vietnam shit like that. But two really good books. Jeff Shara is the killer Angels and Gods and Generals, which is about the Civil War, specifically killer angels about Gettysburg. Gods and Generals is written by his son, which is like a prequel, if you will. Chancellorville and another battle. But they talk about the disease and the amputations, and they’re just like, legit song off limbs. There’s just a pile of limbs outside of the war tent, the surgery tent. And it’s like, holy fucking shit. And you connect this, like you said, with medieval times. But this is 150 years ago. This isn’t that long ago. It’s like, holy shit. What would lead someone to do that? And I think it’s the idea that we have so much stories on this stuff these days that it’d be harder for people. Well, then it was almost seamlessly. You’re from a small farm town and you hear, we’re going to war. It’s just like, oh, great adventure. Let’s go on this wonderful adventure. And you do it. So definitely not. Turns out it’s not. You read this type of book and you’re like, oh, yeah, if I were in war, especially like Vietnam and even Afghanistan, these wars today, there’s a lot of people that come back there, like drug addicts because of it. It’s like, yeah, I would just take whatever is given. Like, I wouldn’t care. It’s just like, I’m going to die anyway. I might as well have a good, good time, smoke some weed or heroin was big in Vietnam. Would you ever blame them for that? I don’t blame anybody for anything after something like that. Because those are boots you cannot walk a mile in. It’s as simple as that. You cannot put yourself in that mind frame whatsoever. And also what you’re talking about with just like the war itself, the trench warfare and the rats they’re talking about in this book. Oh, my god, the rats, man. Stock down rats and their stocks way low. But holy shit. Talking about rats waking you up to them, like nibbling on your face to get some food you have is like, holy shit. It’s even hard to visualize. Actually started watching the 1979 version of the movie that came out was like a made for TV movie. And the only thing that really stuck with me was they did a good job of showing, like, a pile of rats. And I was just like, that’s so many fucking rats. It’s hard when you read in a book. They’re like, oh, there’s rats everywhere. There’s not anything. But then you see 40 rats in a hole crawling over each other is the most disgusting thing. And to think these guys have to deal with it on, like, a day in, day out basis. The idea in this book that rats attacked and killed a couple of dogs and a couple of cats should show you how fucked up the rat situation was. Like, they were able to band together. They’re like, Yo, rat homies. Let’s go fuck up this dog and gnaw it to death. What the fuck is happening? I’m out. No, thank you. War is hell. That sounds terrible. My last stock down is the enemy. The enemy. The enemy itself. So stocks are usually up in the idea of hating the enemy, right? Okay. Enemy hatred. Stock down someone’s enemy. I’m like, yeah, fuck that guy Bowser. Fuck that guy. He’s Mario’s enemy. Hate him. Well, Bowser has to go home and live a life too. Bowser might not be so far from Mario. Yeah, Mario yearns after Princess Peach, but so does Bowser. You know, Bowser goes home, he has his supper. He shits on the same toilet, maybe a little bit bigger than Mario’s. It’s like People magazine. When you open it up, it’s like, oh, celebrities are just like us. Well, the enemy is just like you in so many more ways. And they show that in this book for sure. Where he’s talking about the guy he kills. He’s like, this guy looks like a farmer. He looks like just like we look. He’s just some guy who got pulled into this bullshit like I did. And now I have to stab him to death in the middle of his hole and watch him gurgle as he dies. That’s fucking terrible. Gurgle. It sounds like a German name. There’s good stories that come out of World War One of I think it was, like, Christmas Eve one year and the German lines and I don’t know whether it was French or UK people what English folks or whatnot, but they basically had, like, a ceasefire and crossed no man’s land and traded food, sang together and whatnot. They might even played, like, a soccer game. I think they played, like, a game of soccer in no man’s land. And then it was like, all right, cool. The next day, they’re back to killing each other. And it’s just one more thing that just makes you hate the man and the system. Let’s not hate the individual pieces. Let’s hate the machine that’s pulling them raging. US machine. There you go. It took me wrong. I like this book a lot. It should be something that puts us in the middle of nowhere that I can just make fun of because it’s the ether. It doesn’t really exist. We want to read a bad book next, that we want, like one that we can we’ll just pull up a recent talk of best sellers. Those are our best episodes, let’s be honest. The ones where we just go in and start yelling at things. I actually saw someone recently who was they’re trying to start a genuine conversation with me, which I should have appreciated, but I was like, what are you reading? And she was like, oh, I just love the Reese Witherspoon book club. I’ve been crushing through those books. Her body has not been found since. Weirdly enough, I just looked at her in the face and going, I fucking hate those books. David Jones. The six is good. That’s exactly what I said. I didn’t even notice. Caroline looks over at me like, what the fuck did you just say? And that’s why we all need good women in our lives, because I realized how much of a dick I was being. And I was like, oh, no. But Daisy Jones. The six really saved it. She was great. Oh, God, that’s a lot of dick. You got to come out strong. All right, what do you get for favorite scene in this one? Wasn’t really a scene, but I just liked it when that little bitch Kanyek got enlisted in the army and had to get a little taste of his own medicine. But there’s only like one or two bright spots in this whole book. Kanyek getting enlisted and then wooing the French girls. What about pooping in the woods? I mean, the camaraderie in general, I think that would be under that whole umbrella. But that wouldn’t be a scene that’s just the boys are being boys. We appreciate that, but it was just that the only thing they could do to survive. A couple of good scenes. A couple of just scenes where the boys get laid before they get killed in the war and this little bitch can. Eric having the war, and I assumed he died. I looked it up. I don’t know if he did, though. I hope he did. I hope he actually lived. And I hope he got a couple of limbs cut off. Fuck that guy. Oh, yeah. Fuck that guy for sure. I love the actual war stuff when they do that first counterattack against the French. There’s not a lot of fighting in this, right? It’s just I’m just feeling pounded. Yeah, like artillery, which is probably accurate to trench warfare. Most of the time it’s getting pounded by artillery and then some to go over the top. But the counterattack was part of the rat scene, and then they did the counter attack, and they haven’t eaten in like a week, so they’re like grabbing everything they can before they can have to head back. So it had a mix of all of the feelings where it was like, holy shit, this thing sucks. Like Battle of the Bulge, best Stone kind of vibes into this counter tack where there’s like pew pew, people fighting war. Crazy. And then them getting all this food and running back and then the thrill of it all. Say they sat there for an hour. Like they had so much food they haven’t eaten in like a week. And they just sat there for an hour just like, what the fuck just happened before? They’re like, all right, cool. Let’s get some of that corned beef. So especially if that happened early on, set up the characters really well, set up what this war was really like, and then the rest of it is more of a mental exercise as to how the heck are these people going to get out of this mentally, it turns out none of them do. So tough. Well, I guess we could do a quick picker character. Who’s your boy? I like cat. I didn’t really was older, but I guess he was like an older 40 year old guy. And he kind of lived a life, but it’s just his 6th sense for finding food. I fucking love that part. I like that he was like, I’ll be back. And he came back with like and found food. Somehow I just sniffed it out. I appreciated that. And he seemed just like a good guy. Yeah, I mean, I’m with you. Stanislaw kaczynski, my boy ever. And he’s one of these guys in their crew. Couldn’t imagine if this crew was without him because there are so few ups that all of a sudden this guy is like, okay, so a couple of geese over there like, let’s go get these geese. So yeah. Cool. I’m down. Or like, he shows up, a couple of packs of cigarettes or some cigars. Thank God. I couldn’t imagine if I was in war and ran out of cigarettes. And then one of my buddies showed up with a pack of cigarettes. I’d be over the moon. I love the bartering. I’ll give you a couple of days for a couple of that. I love that aspects of war. It really brings us down to our human nature. They didn’t write about it either, but my assumption is at night they would go out and just scavenge, right? Like all the dead people, they’d go and find their cigarettes, right? Well, I don’t think you’re necessarily risking going into no man’s land for some cigarettes. I mean, when you need a cigarette, you need a cigarette, kid. Because they were risking lives to do random shit. One of the funniest parts is when they’re getting bombed and they’re cooking and they’re like, we got to finish this shit up. They’re just getting shuffled, and they’re like, all right, well, we’re almost done, so it’s okay. You’re like, shit, they caught onto us. They see the smoke, it’s like, well, all right. These pigs need 30 more minutes baked quicker. What do you love about all quiet on the Western Front? I appreciated that this was like when men were men. You got these 18 year old kids living the most awful lives. The book wasn’t about complaining. It was just like, this is our reality. This is how fucking bad shit is. But I go out and I’m like, I don’t want a cigar because it’s going to make my clothes smell, and tomorrow I’m going to have a slightly sore throat. These are just ripping cigars just to get by. I didn’t know they smoked cigars, by the way, back in the day. I didn’t know that was a thing. I thought that was like a high class thing. They had it all snuff, dip. They’re smoking the cigars and cigarettes just to get, like, the smell of blood of their friends, you know, out of their clothes. I’m like complaining about shit. That’s how they’re just men. And I’m you read this book and you’re like, Jesus Christ, I’m so lucky just to not have to do this. Sometimes people ask me even why I like watching professional football. And besides the hundreds of thousands of dollars I’ve gambled on it over the years, it’s really to feel bad about myself because I look at these 20 year old guys who are out there and not only putting their bodies on the line, but the stress. I watched that Patriots game with Matt Jones when he got taken out, and I’m just thinking, this 24 year old guy has to deal with not only his team but also the media. All this bullshit. I couldn’t imagine it. I have a conference call with like 30 people that I have to do, and I’m like, oh, my God, it’s going to be terrible. This guy’s dealing with a whole fan base and national media attention. And he’s a kid. He’s a young guy. The male brain doesn’t even cement itself to 25 years old. It’s just wild to me. It’s not like you do a presentation and all of a sudden, like a six 5255 pound guys running at you. They weren’t expecting to be there. He’s getting variables thrown at him. These guys are getting so many variables thrown at them. There’s nothing they can do to or someone out of presentation. I’m like, is there any questions? And someone’s like, yeah, why did you suck today?

 

Sorry. Someone screaming, chanting for my replacement in the background. So similarly to this, it’s like, these guys, I can’t do it. How much they’re able to endure. One of the things I loved was that the names of the battles aren’t included in this in the book, because it’s not important. He says, they’ve been fighting for months over 100 yards of land. And that’s the point. The point of this book isn’t to be like, okay, this is a firsthand experience of the battle of the Somme or Verdansk or pick your any world War I battle. That’s not the point. The point is just this is a guy who’s in somewhere in France with his buddies and they’re fighting for their lives. That’s the whole point of it. And I love that. Additionally, similarly, it’s almost like connected, but we kind of talked about it. But there’s no glorification of war or like heroism in the colloquial sense. Oh, there’s heroism for sure in this book, but it’s subtle heroism and foxhole heroism kind of you’re there for your buddy. And it’s supposed to be this way because it’s an anti war book for sure. But it wasn’t one of those war books where it’s like gallantry and wow would sacrifice this kind of this thing and the other thing. I mean, we do see a lot of war stuff. A lot of things that are like, oh, it’s amazing, it’s fun. And we like reading those and watching that type of stuff. But yeah, at the end of the day, this book did not hold back in any way. I also liked the guy that cared more about the horses and the soldiers dying. I don’t know if you remember the scene of the guys, the horses are kind of like whining off in the distance and in pain. And the guy’s like, for the love of God, someone like put him out of misery. He’s more upset than that. And the hundreds of people that just died, that was one of the things that also made me realize about war, that it’s a five senses or however many senses we have. It’s a five senses experience because the noises, the sound must be incredible to talk about guys dying in no man’s land. And it’s like you have to hear them for days out there and you can’t do anything. They’re just dying. And these horses which are screaming, I mean, I told you I just got a puppy. I was watching the movie, puppy was in his crate sleeping. And that’s when that horse scene came up and the puppies are freaking out. And I was like, I get it, dude. These horses are just dying in this movie. It’s terrible. The other thing, too, I don’t know if this reminded you a lot of Starship Troopers, obviously, Star Trek Troopers is basically a satirical version of this. What’s going on? There’s a point where the guy’s like suffering and then one of the guys goes over and shoots him and reminded me of the scene. It’s like, I’d expect everyone of you to do the same thing for me when the troops get pulled out of the squad and sniped. Yeah, it was pretty depressing then that this is actually real and stretched as a made up thing. No, I see that for sure. Or when they go to shoot the guy who’s been in the gas or whatnot and the stretcher comes up and takes away. It’s like, well, that’s too bad. He’s going to suffer for a super long time as opposed to just dying here peacefully. And the last thing I love about this book is these are events I’ll never experience, thank God. But I felt like the writer did such a good job making you understand the feeling that these guys are going through. It was almost as good as a Dan Carlin podcast. Listening to this book, you actually get the understanding of why they feel that way based on this experience and the way it’s written. Eric was a World War I veteran, so I assume he was able to take a lot of firsthand experience and firsthand feelings and he was able to put in this book really well. You know, any other less just the last thing. I like the ending. I thought it was appropriate that it was just like no fanfare, no heroic. Last man and he died. It was just like a good ending to a depressing book and Paul came home and invented penicillin. Yeah, I’m just saying with the matter of fact conversation about why a spade is a better weapon than your bayonet. Oh yeah, it’s heavier. Like it’ll cleave someone in half and it doesn’t stick into the body so that you don’t have to like, while you’re pulling it out, get stabbed in the back. It’s like, holy fuck. And they said it’s such a matter of fact way. It wasn’t trying to scare someone. It was like, yeah, that’s just the way it is. Like, wow, the shit that people actually deal with while I’m eating popcorn and watching TV. Jesus Christ, would you hate it? May just in the audiobook, but I had a tough time separating all the side characters. They were pronouncing the German names and I was like, who? When I went back through them I was like, oh, now I get it’s. Like, actually this person or this person? But at the time I was like, wait, which one is that guy? So that was a little tough for me. Did you think the same thing? Oh, you mean himmel, sauce and Bertnik and Dietering and Hammerock? Yeah, he was finale with the accents and I was like, can I get a bob? Yeah, I definitely had a tough. I’d be like, oh, this is the guy who wanted to be the forester, and this is the guy who wanted to be a theologian. That stuff was definitely tough, for sure. I agree with you there. And I guess maybe for my hate they make it seem like if you eat suckling pig, you’re going to shit yourself all night. And I just wanted for the PSA. Suckling pig is delicious if not for the whole murdering a baby pig part. But yeah, it might be fatty. It’s a quite anxious meal for sure, but it’s worth trying once in your life if you can get over the fact that you’re killing a puppy pig. Okay. Another day for me was the subway to get back. Basically, the subway was how everyone got to and fro to the front. Seems like that would be, like, a main military place just to get rid of. Right? I was, like, straightforward. Everyone goes through here. Why don’t we attack this one place? Well, I assume that’s, like, outside of artillery range. Like, you can’t do that. Yeah, I get that. But there’s no, like, spies behind enemy lines or anything you can do there. Good point. Plane the bomb. I mean, that’s how World War I started in the first place. Yeah, that’s what I was thinking. And then just last week, it was one of those books where I reflect on it and I’m like, yeah, that’s a great book. I think everyone should read it, but at times, it definitely was drawn out, and it was a little bit preachy, but I think that was important. When you look back at it like it’s one of those books, there are certain books I look back and I was like, I liked it when I was reading. And I look back, I’m like, all right, I book kind of sucked now I think about it. You don’t know how important it was. My last hate is the Nazis, because this was on their list of books to be burned by the Nazi regime. Yeah. So they didn’t want their people reading this and actually learning something. Instead, they wanted the blind nationalism that this book was preaching against. Well, no government would want anyone to read this book because it just basically was like, why the hell do you ever want to go to war? It basically kills your whole draft initiative. Do we have listener mail? Yeah, you’ve got mail. Austin from Dallas, Texas. Let’s say you have six months left unemployment, but they give you a month leave. Do you take it knowing how hard it is to go back, just to come back? Or do you ride it out and skip that month off, but also knowing imagine that the war ends in, like, four weeks and you decided not to take that month break? What are you doing? Based on the book, obviously, it sounded like Paul, like, hated going back, but what would you do? Coconuts. Yeah. Take the month. Yes, I’m taking a month. Punching the dude in the face. Right. That’s the fact of the matter. They’re releasing you from that jail, right? Once the war is over, probably. Yeah. They’ll figure it out. You’ll be all right. Yeah, good point. Yeah, you’re right. Live it up to one month. Good point. Anyway, just do something crazy. Don’t go home and set up your garden for the next year. Go do something wild. That’s his problem. He didn’t really blow off steam very much. He needed to pick up some sort of habit addiction or something while he went back. All right, so we can cast the movie if we want. This was made into a movie in 1931. Some Academy Award. It was adapted again in 1979 as a made for TV movie, which I actually started watching. And it’s quite good, actually. It’s not bad at all. And now it’s going to be its third adaptation, this time in the hands of Netflix. It’s being released this Friday, October 28. I’m pretty sure it’s in German. I think it’s going to be a subtitled movie. I actually haven’t watched the preview because I didn’t want to spoil the book for myself. But, yeah, I’m interested to see it. Considering it’s German, I don’t really have a ton of casting for it. I’m not like Michael Fassbender’s character in Inglorious Bastards and know all the German cinema people. I didn’t cast any specific characters. I just chose five dudes that I think looks German or are German. I’ll read you mine off. First off is who’s actually in the new movie. Daniel Bru burl. Bruce. He’s the guy from English bass the Sniper. Yeah, he’s great. He speaks like ten languages. He plays every nationality insane actor. Then I did. Terren egerton. He kind of looks like a German dude. And I did Michael Fassbender, who can speak German. He can. As was seen in Ingler’s Bastards. I did Tomasica. He is actually German. He’s the guy with no name or face, whatever, from Game of Thrones. Well, if it’s a W, it’s pronounced as a V in the Germansica. Yeah. Tom Vlasicaa. He’s German. And then lastly, Joel. He’s Swedish. Joel Kinnaman, who is like, you recognize him. He’s in The Informer, some Netflix show. Throw those five together. That’s my own song. Cast them over the book you want. They all speak English. They all are somewhat German. All right, so next up, we’re getting back into the bread and butter. Some ya fantasy vibes with right up her alley, six of Crows by my girl Lee Bardugo. So, yeah, I’m excited. I can’t wait to get into it. And until then, bye now.