Southwest’s Open Seating is the Worst & How to Fix It
I have yet to speak to a single person that likes Southwest open seating process. I just experienced this awful “cost saving” method on a flight to Nashville. There were no other direct flights to choose from so I had to go Southwest and once again I found myself ranting and raving. I could spend all day complaining about it, but here at the BBC we never just complain, we bring solutions.
Issues with Southwest’s Open Seating
First let me quickly establish why Southwest open seating is the worst:
- 24 Hour Check-In – There is nothing you can say to convince me that this makes any sense. Why are the best seats given to those who remember to check in 24 hours beforehand/mashes refresh quickest? Why are they rewarded? Southwest saw how shitty Ticketmaster’s system was for buying popular tickets and they we’re like, ‘yes, let copy that’. As a consumer by purchasing early I am helping Southwest with inventory/demand/flight schedules… If I purchase late I understand that there will be a lack of seat selection and higher costs, those are the breaks. Shouldn’t you be rewarding people that purchase early like every other airline? Plus, how does everyone signing onto the app at once and mashing refresh to check-in not crash their app? And if I have an early flight, I now have to set my alarm early two days in a row in order to check in on time? How does that make sense. Awful check-in process that rewards people for the wrong reasons.
- Awkward Boarding Process – I already hate flying, I get anxious every time, but Southwest asks, ‘How can we make your flight even more stressful?’ Best way to do this is make you get lined up well before the flight. Make you start getting more antsy and nervous, have you checking the priority numbers around you see where you belong in line. Can’t just throw some head phones on and relax before your flight, you have to be up and ready because you don’t technically have a seat. Ultimately this only leads to a Black Friday like rush when you actually are able to board the plane, which leads too:
- Awkward Seat Selection – This isn’t as big of an issue if you check in early and get on the plane first, however, most flights are full and so there will always be a mad grab to get the best seats. There are numerous awkward seat selections moments that must occur on every flight, here is a list within a list:
- A. Best Seats are Gone – At some point all the window and aisle seats are taken – this creates a log jam at the back of the plane and those people try to push their way back to the front.
- B. Seat Savers – Someone saving a seat for a friend or just not wanting someone to sit next to them, so now you have to look like the asshole and ask for the seat?
- C. Sitting with Kids – The worst of all of these is when you do happen to get a window or aisle seat but a family comes onto the plane late with little kids and wants you to move to a middle seat so they can sit with their young kids. What are you supposed to do be an asshole in this situation and say no? Plus, I’m not allowed to sit next to kids… I mean what.
- D. Middle Seat Choice – If you’re like me and forget to check in the day before, you’ve resigned yourself to sitting in a middle seat. But who do you decide to sit next to? It now becomes a scouting game and just adds to the stress of flying. You have to decide between the old man that will chat you up the whole flight, the large fella that is overflowing into your seat, the woman that pees every 30 minutes, and the two fitness models (why is this never an option?). The worst thing is the disappointment that you cause when you choose to sit in between someone. It’s like you’re farting directly into their face. Just pure hatred and disgust. The rest of the flight they just begrudgingly shake their head at you and usually end up stealing your arm rest. Hey, it wasn’t my fault, blame Southwest!
Ultimately this is what I do anytime I do get a window seat:
Southwest Open Seating is “Faster”
All of this is done in the name of saving time, “Numerous studies showed that open seating enabled Southwest to get Customers on planes more quickly and efficiently than its competitors. Faster boarding meant more on-time departures, and cost savings that led to lower ticket prices.”
Listen, I’m dumb, you can convince me of a lot of things, but I’m not this dumb. There is just zero way this statement can be true. What takes the longest when boarding a flight? Overhead storage, seat confusion, making people get in and out of their seats (causing traffic jams), and families (kids just take longer). All of these things are only amplified by Southwest’s open seating. Not having assigned seats leads to way more issues with seat selection (see above), more traffic jams (since all the people coming in last will be occupying middle seats, thus all the aisle seat people have to get out), and just more overall confusion/stress.
How to Planes Should Be Boarded
Here is what how planes should be boarded to save time and ultimately cost the airlines less. We can keep the Southwest grouping and positions but instead we have assigned seats and file from the back of the plane to the front to avoid traffic jams and people having to get in and out of their seats.
1. Military – They served our country they deserve a lot more than just being able to be seated first, but at least we can say ‘we’re doing our part’. Plus, you ever see how these guys/gals pack and follow orders? Let them on first, set an example of how to board in an expedited fashion. Anyone gets out of line it’s always good to have some military folks on board who can come in and judo chop when needed. God Bless America.
2. Singles – Let’s face it, if you’re flying by yourself you’re a pathetic loser, but you’re much more time efficient (I should know I fly by myself all the time). You’re packing lighter, not chatting with anyone, and you’re ready to end your miserable life… I mean ready to board. These people don’t have a lot to look forward to so why not let them board first and give them the ability to store their carry-ons. Window seat first, then middle seats, then aisle seats (for rows that have 3 singles).
3. Couples – Next comes the couples. Couples overpack, over-complain and overshare. Let everyone else get settled, get their noise canceling headphones on and get situated so they don’t have to stand in-line and listen to couples argue or gossip or give each other OTPHJs.
4. Groups of 3+ – Look at you, you have friends, you’re probably going somewhere fun. Must be nice. You’ll probably be drinking the whole flight and being loud, well I’m jealous, so fuck you, you’re boarding second to last.
5. Families with Kids/Infants – Let’s face it, everyone hates you. You take the longest, you have cause the most headaches, no one wants to sit next to you. Between the kicking of the seats, the shitty diapers, and the throw-up (to be fair these were all things I did on the way back from Nashville), you’re just the worst. I don’t get airlines that board families first. Let the people that take the longest to board and are the most annoying on first to slow everything down? How does that make any sense. Let them go last and have everyone looking at them knowing they are what is holding the flight up. I’d even have the flight attendance announce “we’re all set just waiting for the families to board and we can take off.” Add a little extra peer-pressure.
I’d even make it a competition to see who could board fastest, make a game out of it. This is how you fix the seating issue, not what Southwest is doing.
Alright, I think that ends my 1,000+ word rant, any additional input or do you work for Southwest and hate us? Reach out or check out our other Blogs.
